Who is on your Board of Directors?

I have a friend who has an imaginary board of directors and the Chairman is Oprah Winfrey. I wonder who would be on your board of directors?
Mine would be a very small board, not because I dont like to take advice, it's just that I don't meet or hear of many people that inspire me. Perhaps i'm not getting out and about enough.
Lucy Kellaway would definately be the Chairman. In control, humorous, intelligent with an ability sift through all the management twaddle.
I know it's fashionable to like Barack Obama and he's highly sought after right now but he certainly talks a lot of sense and he always seems to be in the right place at the right time. This morning I heard him say to the American people, now's the time for us to work on our foundations, not on our home decor, drawing the analogy with the economy- how cool is that. It is also the Chinese New Year of the Ox, the sign of prosperity through fortitude and hard work. Apparently Obama was born in the year of the Ox- no wonder he is inspiring me with confidence.
Meryl Streep would have to be on there- so graceful, serene, a calming influence for my boardroom, infinite wisdom and experience. A multi-tasker.
Robert Plant would be there to make sure everyone carries through on their decisions and sticks to their moral values.
Honorary members would be a famous architect I know for his ability to give silent approval and quiet constructive criticism. Mary Poppins for her way with children, networking abilities, for good advice and encouragement.

Virgo and Taurus

Virgos find Taurus the bull patient and loving. Taureans find Virgins peaceful and composed. The bull likes to luxuriate in the bath for hours at a time, lights off and candles flickering- the Virgo too likes to lazily watch the last shades of twighlight on the living-room wall. Taurus loves to plan and cook sumptuous feasts whilst the Virgo likes to pick the herbs and chop the garlic (crush it more like). Virgos and Taurus both love attention to detail. They understand each other. I wonder why I haven't bumped into many Taureans in my lifetime?
From a tiny book on starsigns by Stephanie Russell

Mona on high-tech gadgets

Lucy Kellaway hits the nail on the head every time. She is the business reporter in the Financial Times and also talks on BBC world service. She has a friendly voice- the type of person I would have liked to have been friends with if I went to her school at the same time as her. She talks a lot of sense and has the confidence to put her point of view across in a business world dominated by men.
Recently she talked about the pen being mightier than high-tech gadgets. She was glad that there was still such a thing as customer service when it came to pens- Cross replaced her pen lid when it broke (even though it was a conference give away in the pre credit crunch days). I have had a similar experience with the valve in a Prestige pressure cooker, although I was told that next time I would have to pay for the replacement- a tiny little rubber thing. (Who uses a pressure cooker these days anyway?)
High tech gadgets such as ipods and Sony Vaio laptops, Canon printers and Sony Eriksson cell phones on the other hand are a different kettle of fish. Lucy is right when she says there is always a Genius Bar in the retail outlets where we try to return the product just when it has reached its warranty expiry date. The genius always explains that it cannot be fixed, “nah, it’ll be cheaper to buy a new one…Have you seen our latest model…that one is obsolete now anyway… this new one has much higher spec than the old one.”. If you wait a couple of weeks, we will have a new delivery of the Canon IP4750.999”. Of course the new model requires completely different print cartridges which Game (where they always win) haven’t got in stock and the difference in quality? You have to buy 5 print cartridges instead of 4.
I have never been a Gerty gadget market leader. I’m what’s described as a 'late adopter'.
Remember that fish that sang “Take me to the river”? I Only just discovered it 2 years after it first hit the shops (thank god). I’m still using my Panasonic Digital (In 1990, digital was a modern word) portable stereo CD system RX-DS303 MASH. It has a depth of sound no ipod nano could ever match. Never been able to work out the MASH aspect of it though.
The $1,400 Sony Vaio does not come with Microsoft office the genius tells me, you can’t get that sort of spec at that sort of price with Microsoft Office thrown in, he says (but not at the point of sale). Couldn’t even give me a Sony Vaio bag to go with it but he could throw in this cheapo one for free.
Did you know also that the new ipod nano cannot be recharged on the Bose docking station? Why? So you have to buy a new updated version of the docking station or yet another adaptor to add to the cupboard full of redundant adaptors, leads, connectors and USB cables. These are what are known as 'late adaptors'.
What needs to be tackled is this constant updating of gadgets- I’m all for technology, R&D but only if it improves my life. At the moment, my life is too complicated, very expensive and the sound hasn't improved. I’m all for the recession if it is going to stop this supply of marginally updated this season's must-haves that already my children think are "so one second ago”.
I have bought them a fountain pen each; perhaps they will be new market leaders and provide a tipping point for an epidemic of quality, longevity and customer service.

Further additions on the postal service

I have just received a Christmas card form an old friend. It was posted in Chelmsford on the 10th December 2008. it is now 16th February. This means it takes 2 months for an air mail letter to get from England to Malawi. Where has it been this Christmas card? Must do some research......

Don't take anything personally

Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you wont be the victim of needless suffering. If people tell you how wonderful you are, they are not saying it because of you. Humans are addicted to suffering and we support each other in maintaining these addictions. Humans agree to help each other suffer. If you have the need to be abused you will find it easy to be abused by others. It is as if they have a note on their back that says "please kick me". Wherever you go you will find people lying to you, and you also lie to yourself. Do not expect people to tell you the truth bacause they also lie to themselves.
If someone is not treating you with love or respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesnt walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal.
From 'The Four Agreements' by Don Miguel Ruiz

Mona on getting older

It crossed my mind earlier that there would be nothing better than to sit in my new wing back chair and put my feet up on a foot stool and just enjoy the moment, the solitude, the serenity, the pictures on the wall and read a book in the comfort of my surroundings, with no guilt, in the knowledge that the clock is ticking anyway whether I do something about it or not. I then imagined an elderly person in a care home who was doing just that. A theory came into my head that perhaps elderly people don't mind sitting in a wing back chair with their feet up, just thinking, in solitude, watching time pass in the comfort of their familiar things. The clock ticking, the moment continuing on and on with no interruptions, nothing to take you away from your train of thought, staring and smiling knowingly when someone asks you a question. "You what dear?", "isn't she lovely?", "what have you been doing since I last saw you Agnes?" "Now't fresh" will be your reply. How irritating the interruption when you had just got thinking about something. "Time for your bath Agnes!", "What's for dinner Mum?". "It's tea time pet, up we come", "where's my sports kit Mum?". You deserve to sit and think and stare and not recognise anyone, you've earned it, you've been on your feet and worked your fingers to the bone for a long time.

Gemini

Life is never tedious when Gemini is in the game. The twins adore life in the fast lane. Gemini requires an entourage to keep its fluctuating moods appeased but time flies with Gemini when you sit down to a volley of ideas. The twins flirt from one thing to another with lightening speed, they are an innovator and entrepreneur. The twin's fierce energy will add some much-needed spice to our lives but they may quickly tire of our regular dull routine. The twins are often absent, they love freedom to wander and roam but when they have finished travelling, they will happily repair to a sedate environment in- waiting.
quoted from a little book on star signs by Stephanie Russell

Sexy fruit

I just discovered a new fruit- never seen anything like it- absolutely beautiful. People would pay a fortune for this in M&S and it's literally just evolving out of my cactus tree. It tastes a bit like a kiwi but looks absolutely heavenly. If it doesn't have a name I'm going to call it a St Valentine pear. This is my fruit bowl-guess which one it is.

Feast or Famine

I love avocados, I have four trees, they all come at once in February.

I have guacomole with fresh hot green chillies and coriander also from the garden.

I have Avocado Ritz for lunch, sometimes with cooked chicken, tuna or prawns mixed with a dollop of freshly homemade mayonnaise.

I have greek salad with avocado in it and just plain sliced with salt and pepper and lemon juice.

My daughter makes a vinaigrette, spoons it over half an avocado in the skin and scoops it out with a spoon

One member of my family recalls having it with sugar as a kid.

How do you preserve avocado?

My Mum, an expert in all things, says you can't. But you can mash it and freeze it she said. I said "Doesnt it go brown?" Never got to the bottom of it as the conversation swiftly changed to a heated discussion (much to the interest of the other guests in the restaurant) about the world being run by reptiles and bloodlines. The rest of us are just mind- controlled through the media like the News of the World which of course is controlled by the very same lizards. She has a point. More about this later......

On being human

Someone asked me the other day-
" What's it like to view the human race from an outsider's point of view?"

Things I hate, by Billy Connolly

People who point at their wrist when they ask you the time.
People who tell you they are going to the toilet (whilst pointing at their....)
Political rallies in rush hour
Powercuts
New roadworks with inadequate road markings
Policemen who stop you just because they can

What's Hot/What's Not

What's Hot / What's Not

1. Voluntourism / Managed Portfolios
2. Footing /Mini-bus drivers
3. Lucy Kellaway /Anne Widdecombe
4. Freckles /Belly rings and tattoos
5. Good Black leaders /Political correctness
6. Self-improvement /Conservatives
7. Quality /Quantity

Diplomacy on the back Burner

If you're going to opine
don't do it on wine
you'll raise a fracas 'tis true,
have a richt guid blether
'bout such like the weather
auld aquaintance you'll lose but a few.

If you want to be greetin'
best go to the meeting
and not be rigid nor wise
rather be mute
without any dispute
and only tell lily white lies.

By Mona with a little help from Rabbie (patent pending)